Heartless Jerk

As mentioned in a previous blog of mine I've only ever been "in love" once. I deeply cared for this kid like crazy. When he got back from his mission we finally pursued something between the two of us. We dated for like 3 weeks. I was twitter-patted and I never get twitter-patted. I was comfortable with him and I KNEW he cared about me. Or at least he had 2 years ago. When we started seeing if a relationship was the way to go I got a little worried I loved him I knew that but I was worried that the only reason he was with me was because I was convenient. When he got back I was right there, he knew that I cared for him, he wasn't stupid. However he decided to play with it a little anyway. I asked him what we were and what we were getting ourselves into. I didn't want to be pulled around like a toy. If his feelings didn't match mine then I was fine with going back to just being friends. Then the creep pulls me in and kisses me to reassure me of his feelings. What he was really doing was assuring himself that he had a little playmate to release his selfish hormonalness on. He wanted someone to cuddle and kiss and he wanted to assure himself that he would have that. That he could have his play time while he searched for someone that he really wanted. I dedicate this poem to him. Please understand before you read it that when I say "friends with benefits" and "whore" I mean the mormonized version of it. I mean he wanted someone to cuddle with and kiss no strings attached. Even a month and a half later he offered to be "friends with benifits" because he is a creaton. He kept trying to present it like it was for me, "Well I know that you still like me so if you want we can be friends with beneifits, as long as you understand that's what it is", wow thank you I'm so flattered to know you think so cheaply of me. That you think I would be interested in meaningless affection to appease your horniess, NO THANK YOU.

You only think you love me

cause I'm convenient.

You only think you love me

cause I'm right here.

You only think you love me

cause nothing better's around.

You only think you love me

cause you're selfish.

You only think you love me

cause you don't want to try anymore.

You only think you love me

cause I'm right here.

You only think you love me

cause you're hormonal.

You only think you love me

cause you want someone.

You only think you love me

cause you're a jerk.

You wanna play with my

heart a little more?

I'm no friend with benefits

and I'm not your whore!

Get out of my life!

Get out of my heart!

You're not welcome here anymore!

Your touch used to mean

something special to me.

But it's all full of your lies.

So get out of my heart.

Clarification of feelings

So people are weird sometimes. I'm kind of fascinated by people that constantly feel the need to remind you of their marital status or their feelings for you. I'm going shopping later cause I have a girlfriend, I can't watch a movie with you guys cause I have a girlfriend, I can't breathe the same air as you.....cause I have a girlfriend. I'm pretty sure these guys are cousins with those that constantly tell you that you're a sister to them. I could never date you you're like a sister to me. You look hot today but you are such a sister to me. And then theirs those that make reference to you like you're already theirs. You know what I like about you? You have brown eyes, just like my other girlfriends. Here wear my jacket, all my other girlfriends have. The mention of "other girlfriends" has ironically been used on me by people that I very much was not dating. Why would you clump me together with your "other" girlfriends if I'm not dating you? People that feel the need to clarify themselves make me laugh, probably because I know i do it too.